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Re: List of Full Suspension MTB Frames

TL;DR
: I'm not a shill.  I'm here to help.  I love you all.  Or, for the less literate, more mathematically inclined: me = friend

Hey, all! It looks like you're all enjoying this list, but maybe have a few questions, so I thought I would take some time to answer both barrels of  fan mail.

Our first questions comes from sclyde2, sclyde1's younger, less popular, more easily startled, half-brother:

Q: "Why have you done this to me?"
A: Well, sir, I like to think of this list as something that has been done for you, not to you. Any incursion into your apparently massive personal space has been inadvertent. The "why" is rather simple; someone went to the trouble of making a list of hardtail frames, and that post went and got itself an agent, a publicist, a line of collectable action figures, and eventually, stickied. I thought, perhaps foolishly, that a similar list of full suspension frames would be useful to people.

Q: "Are you a slut-filled sock puppet for the Taiwanese carbon mafia?"
A:  That's a big negative, buddy.  My nationality is the United States.  I don't get paid to post on the Internet, or for anything.  I live and work near the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Los Angeles, where I am a volunteer slash trespasser.  In my spare time I play bass in a spoon band. We're called Ain't Got No Tine for This. You may have heard some of our hits: (I wanna) Put My Soup in You, Slurp it Up, or All Innuendo Aside Let's Have Sex (in your mouth). When I'm not volunteering, trespassing,  or slappin' spoons, I make posts in online mountain biking forums.

Q: "While sifting through the incomprehensible mess of data from the emerging factory-to-consumer bicycle market you overlooked some, what I consider to be obvious, models.  Do you apologize?"
A: No, no apology intended, m'lord.  In fact, I had anticipated this very scenario and thusly diagrammed and constructed a series of action plans to address the dilemma.  The first 30 of these plans were all variations on a theme of farting into mostly empty peanut butter jars and then mailing them to dignitaries, statesmen, and Mayor McCheeses of online mountain biking communities, but in a movie-like moment of inspiration, the kind that spirits the protagonist from the first act to the second act on a wave of fist pumps, I decided I would just edit the original post to include any info I missed on the first pass.  It was beautiful in its simplicity, but left me wondering what I'm going to do with all these peanut butter jars.

Q: "Can we talk more about the beautiful and luxurious FM936, with its many available sizes and options if I provide an affiliate link and a reminder that if you use the promo code #SelfRighteousIndignance you'll receive a ten percent discount on your first purchase?"
A: Looks like the sock puppet is on the other hand, your lordship.  How does it smell?

Q:" I want there to be more companies selling carbon bike frames, and I want their names on your so-called list last week. Do you apologize? "
A: Again, no apology has been intended. The carbon frame listings on AliExpress.com are dominated by a few vendors who flood the database with hundreds if not thousands of duplicate listings for the same SKUs. Should they be ashamed of themselves, bed wetters that they are? Yes. Should they be given a good scolding, a nicotine stained finger wagged in their face, and sent to bed without supper? Yes. Should their listings be trimmed to more accurately reflect the products they offer and make the site more usable for consumers? Again, yes, but neither I nor my so-called list are responsible for making those things happen. Furthermore, how many companies are actually making carbon bike frames?  My hunch is that the number is around 10, possibly fewer .  It's possible that if the list doesn't die before it learns to walk it might learn more about the carbon bike market and include more vendors. It's still very young at the moment, but it's been smoking a lot more than you'd expect,  it's been spiking it's milk with rocket fuel, and yesterday it came home with a tattoo that says "Live fast! Die young! Kill kill kill!" and there's a picture of a dragon holding a schematic for a doomsday device.

Q(implied): "Do you have any idea who my dad is?  You think I won't get you banned permanently if you tick me off?  I've eaten better men than you before breakfast."
A1: I'll be honest with you, sclyde2, this Q&A has grown to be quite the wall of text, and I expect your wet-nurse stopped reading it to you pages ago, but I will go ahead and answer the question for my own amusement:
A2: That's exactly what my parents said after they found out I'd been stripped of my spelling bee crown due to doping accusations.  And I will tell you exactly what I told them: "Can't nobody tell me nothin'" which is actually just a quote from Lil Nas X's magnum opus Old Town Road, which I was listening to at that moment.  And I'm still listening to it, your highness.  I'll never stop.

I'm going to stop now, as I feel I've answered all of the questions I feel like answering for now.  Feel free to keep 'em coming, though.

I love you!

March 09, 2020, 11:43:31 PM
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Re: List of Full Suspension MTB Frames
Dirt, I reckon if you put as much effort into your first post as you did your reply then you might have got a very different first response.

UglyBirdFromAPrisonColony26, I reckon if you didn't look like a dingo with a prolapsed anus glued to its face you wouldn't have been asked to leave Bunnings.

Laffs aside, the first post took about a week of clicking through an endless pile of identical looking frames and cataloging unique entries.  It was not meant to be complete, just a starting point, much like primary school wasn't meant to be the capstone of your education. 

March 10, 2020, 11:23:14 PM
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