I would perhaps consider a gravel style frameset, which you can build out more like a road bike. I had a really good experience with the Ceccotti RF25 (also sold as the Spcycle G056, TanTan GR029, same design) frameset. Very relaxed geometry and comfortable to ride. It's not ultra lightweight (mine came out to 1160g in small), but for you I would prioritize comfort and fit.